S04 E02: We're BACK!

Yes, your feed HAS refreshed and this IS a new episode! 

We couldn't let the most explosive season in Scottish football finish without us could we?

Join us - Andrew Slaven, Laura Brannan and Findlay Marks every week between now and the end of the season.

We start off with a look back at some of THE most insanely cinch moments that should not be allowed to be forgotten, we look forward to the World Cup and how poor it's going to make us... and of course we are preparing for PURE CINEMA as the split approaches. 

RUNNING ORDER:
00:00: INTRO
00:37: SEAON 25/26 HAS BEEN RIDICULOUS: Catch up on all the nonsense from the season so far.
20:09: SCOTLAND: The small matter of having qualified for the World Cup this summer, and Steve Clarke's provisional FIFTY-FIVE man squad!
23:26: ALCOHOL: Are we finally heading in the right direction to enjoy a pint at a game? And what are the repercussions with recent fan violence?
29:26: THE RUN IN: Cards on the table - can Hearts actually do it?
41:34: OUTRO

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:02

Hello, welcome to the Scottish football show. It's gonna be loud, we're back! Why? Why? Anyway, here's what's coming up. Sounds like you've had more managers than Bookens. Motherwell are playing like Prime Barcelona 2011. Rangers are on a bigger comeback than Oasis, and Hummarts are making the whole world stop and notice. We've got a fucking title race. Oh, by the way, actually, we've also qualified for the World Cup. That's gonna be fun. I just put the windscreen wipers on in my car, because that's what I'm reduced to now, uh, ladies and gentlemen. Um, we haven't done this podcast in quite a while because I had I have too many children and because I'm a potent beast. So I decided to say, lads, we need to stop this. I'm I'm a dangerous, dangerous thing. Let me turn the windscreen wipers OFF. And so we called it kind of quits, and then Scotland qualified for the World Cup. We came back for a little hip hip hooray. But I think we're cup we're we're glory hunters now. We're coming back because we want to be part of the the big story that is the greatest title race that we've seen probably in my lifetime, because I was born in '88. I don't really remember any title races at all. So joining me as usual, Finlay Marks from Australia and Laura Brannon from uh from London. Just none of us live in Scotland, but we're all desperate to be there. Finn, how are you doing? How are you enjoying it across the many, many ponds and across a war zone? Across the war zone.

SPEAKER_02 1:47

What a year. Yeah, a lot a lot has happened, hasn't it? It's uh it's been a it's been a crazy time. It's been the most mental season, and uh if anybody's seen the trailer that we've put out, uh that that's basically been we've spent about nine months still all messaging each other every weekend, being like, why don't we have a show again? Because we're just like anything that's happened this season surpasses anything that's happened in the previous uh three or four years we've been making the show and and before that as well. It's just been absolutely crazy. What's new? What's new? Anything changed? Uh I'm still listening. I've um so I I the regular listeners to the show will know that uh for the past couple of years I've been working for Melbourne City in the A-League over here. Uh I've actually finished there and I've left to kind of come back to the freelance world but in a slightly different way. So I'm actually um setting up my own creative agency here in Melbourne and will be yeah, heading up all my own stuff, which is quite exciting. Doing that ahead of the World Cup, not necessarily going to America, but certainly working on stuff from Australia who have also qualified, of course. And one of those things where I know the kickoff times are absolutely bogging for everybody back home, but because I live in the future, it actually makes the kickoff times quite nice for me here. So we'll be looking forward to that. A bit of a busy year for you as well, Laura, isn't it?

SPEAKER_01 3:18

Yes, yes, it has been. Um we've all been away doing our own things, having babies, changing jobs. Me did neither of those, by the way, just to clarify, did not have a baby and did not change jobs. I did get married though.

SPEAKER_03 3:33

That's all the male listeners now not tuning in now, Laura. You know, you've got a ring on your finger.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

I don't know, Andy, the way you're talking. If I just had to look at you and I might be pregnant soon, it's quite scary. Some track record you've got there. But no, I've been away. Yeah, I again it was another reason to put the podcast on hold this season. I was doing a lot of wedding planning come the start of the season. Um, so that all kind of took over, took priority, and then we held off booking our honeymoon until we waited to see what happened in the qualifying campaign. And now we are merging our honeymoon with the World Cup in a couple of months' time. So it's been very exciting planning that side of things.

SPEAKER_03 4:18

That's amazing, Laura. So, where where are you? I mean, there'll be so many fun stories from lots of people this summer, but where what is your plans? Where are you heading?

SPEAKER_01 4:26

So, we're actually going to do the honeymoon first um and do it on the west coast of America. Get it out of the way.

SPEAKER_02 4:32

Just get it out of the way before the real stuff starts.

SPEAKER_01 4:35

All the formalities. Uh West Coast road trip, and then we're going to fly home via Boston for just going for the one game because we're not millionaires and we have splashed out a lot for these tickets for the Haiti game. But uh, yeah, just getting one game in is is special enough for me. And it also means I can go home as well and get back up the road for at least one of the other games as well. And share it with all these different people, like share it with friends that are going over there, share it with family that are not for the the following games, um, and maybe even soak up a little bit in London as well with the kind of the Scottish crowd down here as well, because we did a lot of qualifiers that way, and um it's a really strong crowd as well. So there's so many of them.

SPEAKER_03 5:17

Maybe we'll actually get a pint together, Laura. Maybe we'll I'll actually we'll have to book it in, mind you.

SPEAKER_01 5:22

I don't believe you. I mean, my wedding was the only time I've seen you, Andrew, in about five years in real life. My busy man. Fair play, you did well. You you MC'd for us at the wedding day, so uh you you played your part.

SPEAKER_03 5:36

You're damn right. I'm available for free. Weddings and permits for us. Um, what I was gonna say, my biggest tip for you going to Boston, by the way, because it's probably my favourite city in America, go to the Green Dragon. Um, it's this, it's like the one of the oldest pubs in America, and it's where um I was gonna say JJ Abrams, but it's um Paul Revere and Samuel Adams wrote the like the Boston Tea Party was all done in that pub.

SPEAKER_01 6:08

Oh no, it still exists.

SPEAKER_03 6:10

The Sam Adams. Yeah, the Samuel Adams. Uh and uh Paul Revere, and there was a few others that I can't remember because I'm not a history buff, but it does good booze and it does good food. Uh Green Dragon, if you're listening.

SPEAKER_02 6:24

Nice. Can I just say as well, Laura, like that's it's it's brave of you picking that fixture. You're not going for the what's sure to be the victory, the incredible victory over Brazil. You're not going for the disappointing draw uh against Morocco, you're going for the crushing opening defeat to Haiti.

SPEAKER_01 6:42

Absolutely. The the one-nil defeat where we're not even going to get a goal.

SPEAKER_03 6:53

I mean it's an interesting place. Do we do we start about Scotland and the World Cup or should we the reason that we are back and the reason that we're gonna do an episode every week now until the end of the Scottish uh domestic season is because we've got a title race, and I feel like we should talk about the domestic football really, because the international stuff's gonna take care of itself and we'll react off that when it happens. But this is the this is I said at the top, this is the greatest um moment of my life. Uh this is the greatest like title race I've ever seen, like for for Scottish football fans. And I just don't think I ever would have saw it when the season started and everyone was there's all last season it was like Aberdeen, wasn't it? And they just went on a big mazy run for like nine games or ten games. It never it there's always a team that starts well, but after 13-14 games it just pitters away. Hearts have stayed there, and there's only a few games left to go. I said that if they got past Christmas, they've got a really good chance, and I'm gonna I I don't know what to say anymore.

SPEAKER_01 7:59

I mean, I I said even if they get to Easter, I still don't believe it's gonna happen, but they kind of do now, and it's so exciting.

SPEAKER_03 8:08

Are you saying are you saying hearts will win it then, Laura?

SPEAKER_01 8:11

I'm not saying they'll win it, I'm saying they're definitely in it. I said and the fact it's gonna go right down to the wire is just the greatest thing. I said a real barometer for me is the fact that I can go into work in an office in England.

SPEAKER_04 8:22

I said, I said, and normally I said on the butt of all jokes, people do not care about Scottish football in the slightest.

SPEAKER_01 8:28

I said and now, deadly seriously, I said they are coming to me talking about Scottish football.

SPEAKER_04 8:33

I said they are they're sitting on their phones at lunchtime and they're going, Oh, the post-split fixtures have been announced. Look at who hearts are playing on the last day, and I'm like, What? Where's where has this come from?

SPEAKER_01 8:45

It's so exciting to see other people take such a genuine interest in our game.

SPEAKER_03 8:51

Did you notice that they even know what the split meant? Because I had to explain that to my office. They were just like, What, what? Yeah, what what why? Why?

SPEAKER_01 9:01

I get a lot of so are they still to play each other? And I'm like, Oh yeah, oh yes, this is the best thing about the split is because they're only going to play each other.

SPEAKER_03 9:11

Who who's there's been a lot of talk that Celtic have benefited, and there's been loads of conspiracy theories about the whole idea that the last day of the season it's at Celtic Park and it's hearts, which, regardless of where it is, for me for that to be the last day of the season, the current champions against the potential, you know, candidates or you know the next ones. And it might not be, it might not work that way anyway. Like, do you believe in the conspiracy theories, Finlay? Or do you think I heard somewhere that Rangers have got a crapper running than it than all three of them?

SPEAKER_02 9:48

Is that true? Oh, I I think you've got to embrace the conspiracy theories uh entirely, Andrew. This is this is what our domestic game is based on without the bam pottery and the nonsense, where would we be? Um it's just been electric, like it's been so crazy watching it because I think you're right, Laura. Like at the start of the season, I think most of us were expecting, because it was a great start from hearts, for it for them to be like this season's Aberdeen, like an incredible stretch for 12 games. But the the issue for teams outside of the old firm is always consistency, it's it's it's keeping that up over the course of a season. And how many times have we seen like good sides? I I I remember a few times, like um maybe back in the like the late 90s, the Hart side under Jim Jeffries was pushing towards there, and you had like the really good motherwood side of the early to mid-90s as well, under Tommy McLean that you know had like Tommy Coyne and stuff. I remember like they were finishing second at one point or whatever, and obviously, like we've had going back to the 80s, it was 40 odd years now, you had really good Hearts teams, Aberdeen teams, and Dundee United teams, the latter two of which obviously won league titles as well. But I think like you're saying oh you can't remember title races, like we've had some exciting days, obviously, you know, like helicopter Sunday or final days with goal difference and stuff. But the fact that we could now and probably will be heading to uh at least close to a final day, if not the final day, with three teams all with a distinct possibility of winning it, is incredible. I I'm not necessar necessarily sure of the qualities being of the highest calibre, but you cannot argue that it's just been absolute cinema the whole season. Um and I I not to like time stamp it too much, but obviously we're recording this the day after the the Falkirk versus Rangers game, and like that weirdly almost felt like a microcosm for the whole season, just total chaos from start to finish. Nobody could predict where it was going to go next. You don't know who's turning up, you don't know who's gonna absolutely crap it on the day. Like, it's just the whole thing's been absolutely box office, and it's hard trying to uh recap it without I almost diminitising Hearts' uh effort in some way, but almost a little bit of a pat in the head, like, oh congratulations, you're still here. But I I I think it is like this perfect cocktail of Hearts having the season of their lives and both the old firm sides struggling. Is kind of you need a bit of that recipe, that cocktail to happen in order to give you like the drama as it's unfolded. But I mean, like, we're talking just about three sides, like you could be starting anywhere, like the amount of absolute nonsense that is going on this season, it's just why Scottish football is the best league in the world.

SPEAKER_01 12:38

You you came out with a really good start, Finn, um, this weekend, actually, saying that before this weekend there'd only been one fixture round of the season where Hearts, Celtic, and Rangers all won their games. So this weekend is the second time this has happened, and we're five games off the end of the season. That is insane. I mean, it's the closest league in Europe. I was I was looking at the different leagues. You're you're talking like out the top five, right? PSG are four ahead of Lon, who are six ahead of Leo. Bundesliga, Bayern are 12 ahead of Dortmund, right? Finish. Seria are seven ahead of Napoli, La Liga, Barcelona, nine ahead of Real Madrid, Premier League, okay, Arsenal drop points, so it's a little bit closer now, but still six ahead of Mansay, who are 11 ahead of third place Man United. It's not the same. You even look further down, Portugal, Belgium, Holland. I mean, PSV are 19 points ahead of Iron Org at the top of the table. Normally that's us that are complaining about that sort of thing. Turkey looks like the only league that is remotely close to what we are experiencing right now. Galitas and I are currently two points ahead of Ferribacci, who are two points ahead of Transvispor. So that is tight as well. But not as tight as us, because we're tight leading up.

SPEAKER_03 13:57

Oh, absolutely, there's no doubt about it. Even when you think of some of the football that we've seen from Motherwood this year, I remember there was at one stage not too long ago, I think Motherwood were pro had the best defence in more than the top five leagues in Europe as well. It's but one stage. I think after 30 odd games, or sorry, after 28 games, they'd only conceded something like 20 goals. It was something crazy. Um there's been so many good stuff. St Mirrin won the League Cup this year, and then went on an absolute horror show of a run afterwards. It was like a four-month hangover those guys had. And then what's his name again?

SPEAKER_02 14:37

The manager goes he goes to Aberdeen, who might get relegated. Like it's mental.

SPEAKER_03 14:45

Yeah, they'll be alright. They'll be right back.

SPEAKER_01 14:46

I mean, some some of the stories, if you just recap over what we've missed in the last like six months or so, some of the stories are insane. From the very good to the very bad. I mean, Scott McTominay got nominated for a Ballon d'Or. Like that just doesn't happen. What? Like, we are we are competing at the highest of our game. We've got the best league in Europe right now, we've got the best player in Scotland almost almost winning awards. Um, but some of this stuff is incredible, and then at the other end of it, you've got Stephen Presley calling his team, a jobby team. So it's just the best season ever.

SPEAKER_02 15:25

Even like we've we've we've not even talked about like Rangers going for a swim in Locke Lomond or the whole Wilfred Nancy situation that lasted. What was it? Three days three days. Um, the fact that Martin O'Neill's been brought out of cryogenic freezing twice this season to try and rescue it for Celtic.

SPEAKER_01 15:45

And is the coolest pensioner in Scotland. Now, the air fashion age is buzzing off his tracks.

SPEAKER_03 15:52

I'll tell you what, Martin O'Neill was on my flight back to London the other day. No, so I was at I was at my my wee cousin's wedding. I say wee cousin, he's six foot three or something. But uh Martin O'Neill was on my fight, and do you know what? Like, I've seen him before, but it always strikes me he's a really tall guy. Yeah, he's he's like you don't think he's gonna be tall, you just think of like, oh, it's wee Martin O'Neill, we wee guy. Was he was he dressed well? Oh, he was oh, he was very suave, very suave.

unknown 16:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:22

So much. I mean, even when you look at like sorry, Russell Martin, just two words that just spark so much nonsense from the start of the season that everyone's just sort of moved on from and forgot because Rangers have recovered so well from that utter car crash.

SPEAKER_03 16:38

It's funny though, because you say recovered so well, it's just been like plain sailing, it's been like silent assassin work from Danny Rowe. And even though I I thought when when Celtic beat Rangers in the Scottish Cup and on penalties, and you had a lot of Rangers fans going, That's that's it, you can't prepare Rangers their mentality-wise, that he's not getting them geared up for it. I was just like, still in the title race, still got a good chance to win the league. And do you know what? If you win the league and you don't win a cup, in this season of all seasons, you're made.

SPEAKER_02 17:12

There's there's also the the absolutely crazy situation that could still happen where if and it's still a big F, but if Rangers win the league, they could potentially get automatic entry into the Champions League group stage, which is mind-blowing considering where they were. They were ninth when Danny Rule took over. Ninth in October. Like that's unheard of. There's no way in any regular season that one of the teams that starts that poorly should be close to being in a title race by the end of it. It's just been absolutely crazy. And also we're talking about Martin O'Neill, Vilfred nonce, Brendan Rogers, like you almost forget he was the Celtic manager at the start of the season, and like even the the open letter from Dermot Desmond was mind-blowing. And then we've got like I I kind of got buried in other news. I can't remember what happened that day. But Laura, you and I were going absolutely crazy at the whole um Brendan out in Saudi with the you know, like the the garb on and all all of his chat. He was doing the kind of like breath of fresh air thing, you know, his story from when he first joined Celtic and the incident in the Clyde Tunnel that's now kind of legendary, but he was doing the same thing.

SPEAKER_01 18:22

This is just that yet another insane thing that happened. There's photos in mirrors of Brendan Rogers standing there holding a machine gun, and everyone just went, Oh, that's AI, that didn't happen. And then you're like, no, no, that actually did happen. What is going on?

SPEAKER_03 18:40

I don't think I can ever look back on this season and not remember so much that everything is so memorable. If I even look down at like little old Queen of the South, they're in the playoffs, you know. I think playoffs just got secured this weekend as results went elsewhere went well elsewhere. So Queen of the South could be back in the championship next season. It's just a great year for a lot of teams, not for everyone, obviously.

SPEAKER_01 19:04

Well, even Falkirk, Falkirk are doing so well. I mean, they were in league one, what, like two seasons ago, and they've secured like the worst they're gonna do is sixth place. It's it's such a good season, and and the thing is they're challenging, they are competing against the biggest teams and making a difference in these games as well. And Scottish Cup semi-final as well coming up, they're going to hand it at least once more this season. That's good.

SPEAKER_03 19:29

That is good. I mean, we know how good top six can be.

unknown 19:32

Like St.

SPEAKER_03 19:33

Miran achieved it under Stephen Robinson like in consecutive seasons, and we've seen what that can propel a team to do. It's not easy to do that back to back either. But we have seen you know, Dundee did it in their first year back, and then the second year back was a lot harder. So that will be the challenge for McGlynn and Co. next season, but it's been awesome for them!

SPEAKER_00 20:03

The dogs bark and the caravan passes. The caravan keeps moving, the caravan keeps going.

SPEAKER_03 20:09

What about Steve Clark then for the summer? Do you think he's gonna name a full 55 squad? This is this is ridiculous.

SPEAKER_01 20:19

So he has to name a 55-man squad to start with before he then names his 26-man squad. I don't know if he has to make it public or not.

SPEAKER_03 20:28

It's a hell of a party.

SPEAKER_01 20:31

And I don't actually know if it's a good or bad thing if he starts to name 55 players. We did this on the train to the Ivory Coast game in Liverpool last couple of weeks ago, where we tried to actually name 55 players, and I was struggling towards the end, right? You think it's you think it's easy. People who were with said it was easy. I don't think it is. I mean, like Barry Bannon was getting mentioned at one point, and that's when I just said, Stop account.

SPEAKER_03 20:59

It's not goodness. Yeah, no, it's gonna be it's gonna be interesting. Steve Clark was in New York as well this weekend, wasn't he?

SPEAKER_01 21:06

I think it was like Parton Parade or something like that.

SPEAKER_03 21:10

Parton Parade in New York, so Steve Clark was out there having a right old good time.

SPEAKER_02 21:14

Was he um was he repping the new kit at all? Because uh I I think we need to probably mention that the pink one, which I'm a big fan of and most people are, but you used two weren't?

SPEAKER_01 21:24

I think it's Sleep and I think we're the only two people who don't like it.

SPEAKER_03 21:28

Yeah, I've seen it everywhere, and do you know what? I was so close to buying it at Glasgow Airport uh just to piss Laura off and wear it today. But I decided I decided on Intimulan, uh obviously an homage to Denzel Dumfries, where I'm from. So um no, I just And the fact that all we do right now is work on Serie A. Well, yeah, do a lot of Seria football. Um but yeah, I I don't like it. I just think it's absolutely blogging. Um there's not a single bit that I'm like, oh maybe. Notice sometimes kits look horrible as a design, but then when you see it on people, you're like, oh, do you know what actually looks okay? Um, this just looks pure shite.

SPEAKER_01 22:09

It is the colour of every bald man's head when he's being in America for three days. By the time the Haiti game comes around, they're going to be camouflaged.

SPEAKER_03 22:18

Yeah. Wow. What a sight. Look, the home kit's good. Let's just play in that as much as possible.

SPEAKER_01 22:24

Only we won't. Not against Haiti, unfortunately.

SPEAKER_03 22:27

No, we won't. We won't. But uh and you know what? As long as we win. I think is it not? Have we not has it not been said that if you get three points, that's pretty much you're guaranteed to get into the next bit?

SPEAKER_01 22:38

Yeah, but it's also what is it, the eight of the 12 best runners up the eight of the 12 best third place teams go through, and you know that is absolutely going to mean that we are the ninth best third place team. Everyone keeps saying to me, Well, if you beat Haiti, you're dead you're starting. It's like, no, no, no, we're not.

SPEAKER_02 22:55

Yeah, Andrew, you're you're long enough in this game to know exactly that that what Loris just said is bang on the money. Like, we are nailed on to be the best shite third place team just outside qualifying for being getting three points. That's if we beat Haiti.

SPEAKER_03 23:14

If we'd even achieve that.

SPEAKER_04 23:22

Regrets, not just people laughing at it.

SPEAKER_03 23:24

So I didn't find it funny. People, if you do remember us, know that we try to champion a lot of things about Scottish football, not just what happens on the pitch. Like we've done things about safe pyro, for instance. Um, but we're really passionate about alcohol. And uh just in general, just in general, big, big, big fans of it, responsibly, of course. Um, but Laura, alcohol was trialed at Hamden. And uh did it go down well or was it just not even noticed?

SPEAKER_01 23:57

It was not even noticed. I mean, they trialed it in the the upper tier of the south stand, which no one goes to, and it was basically glorified hospitality. In fact, it was in fact, it's the opposite of glorified hospitality, it was the shit version of hospitality because you got it like an hour before kickoff, you had to have finished it 45 minutes before kickoff. You're in some wee room that horrible carpets and can't see the pitch. And yeah, sure, you got a plastic cup and you got a pint poured into it, but who enjoys a plastic pint in general, never mind.

SPEAKER_03 24:33

It seems like the last hour in the shitiest wee nightclub and other shighty wee towns that you know in anywhere in the world.

SPEAKER_01 24:40

It's just I mean, like, it's good that they're trying, it's good we're progressing in some way, but we're progressing at like a snail's pace here. And yes, okay, it's it's it's a small step forward, but like on Saturday there, I was at the Arsenal um Bournemouth game, and Brian Christie, captain by the way, did very well. Uh but the Emirates have the app the Emirates have like like all English stadiums, um, you're allowed to drink in the concourse, and the way that the bars were set up, they had bar lanes, so it's the kiosks that sell food and everything like that. But um, you can go up to any part of it and buy your food and drink, but there are specific queues only for people who are buying beer, and not just the but the beer lane, but there's also a Guinness lane as well, because they sell proper Guinness at the Emirates. I'm just I'm so jealous that they get to enjoy that. They go into the ground early. I packed up and left my um seat in the gantry easily half an hour after the final whistle, thinking the place would be empty when I went on to the concourse. And fans are still standing there, their team had just lost, and they're still standing there with their mates with a pint in their hands. What that what lifestyle? Uh uh not many things in English football make me jealous, but that is definitely one of them. But just that culture and the trust that's there, and yeah, we're we're we're making steps, but we're not making them fast enough.

SPEAKER_03 26:06

Yeah, there's there's there's a severe lack of trust and and uh and that would have been broken even further after the scenes. Um was it iBrooks? Yeah, iBrux when when finally when finally Celtic uh got a proper allocation um and it felt and the atmosphere looked amazing on TV, but then at the end, just an absolute disaster.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

I really hope that they don't start connecting that to alcohol because they wouldn't have that that wasn't because of alcohol. So you can't hypothetically say, well, that would have happened had they been drinking, because it didn't happen and they hadn't been drinking. So let's not try and fake um and imagine problems here. Let's deal with actual problems and not try and f things.

SPEAKER_03 26:55

And you know what? Like it it shouldn't, it shouldn't even mean that uh that Celtic should not get the allocation again. It shouldn't be just for the the minority that ruined it for everyone that that then Celtic don't get it for the next time. However, I think that it probably is.

SPEAKER_02 27:11

It will, it will. I I mean this is a whole podcast in and of itself, and I'm kind of glad that we've there's been a bit of distance between there, but I think that that one for me as well. I I I think on a much wider issue, and this kind of connects back to the alcohol thing. I I don't I can I can't see the police allowing it. And kind of at the end of the day, I know I know we've got broadcasters, I know we've got the clubs and the stakeholders and the SPFL and stuff. The bottom line is if the police say something, that's kind of it. Like they'll they'll they'll counter that. And uh I'm this is opening up a whole tin of beans, but I th I thought the the way that the police can of worms, sorry.

SPEAKER_03 27:53

He's he's softened, he's softened in his Aussie, Aussie ears.

SPEAKER_02 27:58

So angry that I forgot what the metaphor was. It's not not worms, but a delicious tin of baked beans. The way that the police handled that before, during, and after was totally scandalous, and I'm actually quite pleased at the way both Rangers and Celtic took their time in the aftermath to try and basically call that out. Um, and I'm sure there'll be still repercussions for that, sadly. Um, but yeah, it's um that's that's that's a whole podcast in and of itself. But I mean, like there's still the of course there's like this that there's been stuff going on that's a bit more unsavory this this season, but in the main, I think what's really great because those pictures go vi you viral whether you want to or not around the world, and I had friends, uh so many people in in the UK and here in Australia and and all around messaging me being like, What's going on? What's going on at that game? Because that's the stuff that goes around the world. I remember it's the same thing. Nobody gives a shit about the A-League outside of Australia, really. But remember a number of years ago, you'll have seen it, there was like a kind of a a pitch invasion type thing, and the Melbourne City goalkeeper got hit on the head and his head got cut with a sand bucket for putting out pyro, and that kind of like that's the thing that people remember, it's just the stuff that goes around, and it's really disappointing when stuff like that does go viral. What is pleasing though is that yeah, that did go viral and kind of spread around the world, but as just going back to the top of the show, how many other people have been getting in touch? Being like, Can hearts do it? Can hearts do it? Like, I've when is the last time that you've had people genuinely showing an interest in Scottish football outside of like the odd European run that goes somewhere or something funny that will maybe get slightly ahead, you know, out above the parapet in the in the kind of wider consciousness of football? It's just there's been so much positive going on around Scottish football this season that's been really refreshing and and good outside of the nonsense with the police, and of course, this VAR refereeing officiating conversation that has to be there every single week, regardless of what game you're watching.

SPEAKER_03 30:04

So, who who's going to win it then? I mean, if you look at the run-in and you look at some of the things that have happened, who who has the momentum? Because there are three points separate Celtic and third, hearts and first, Rangers are a point behind Hearts, and what there's five games to go, and they all play each other. I mean, how much of a role do Motherwill Hibanian who out of the how Mother will Hibbs and Falkirk are going to cause upsets and who's the harder team for each to face? I mean, Hibbs Hibbs Hearts is going to be huge. And actually, I don't know if it w where it's at, is it Easter Road or is it Easter Road.

SPEAKER_01 30:42

It's the first game after the split.

SPEAKER_03 30:45

Hearts have to go to Hibbs in the first game after the split. That's oh man. Now I won't say who this Hibs fan was. He said to me that he would accept Hearts winning the league just because it it ends the whole stranglehold on Scottish football, which is insane.

SPEAKER_01 31:06

It is, but god, yeah. I mean, I feel like everyone, everyone, it's not Celtic or Rangers and Hibs fan, want hearts to do it. Like everyone wants Hearts to do it just for the the novelty factor of it, to just to break that 40-year wait for it. They go to Eastern Roads, they host Rangers, which to me is the that is the biggest game right now, looking at it on paper. That's bigger than Celtic Hearts of the Last Day because it is it's so soon. It's uh it was first V second. So like that to me is massive, and it's probably gonna be no no.

SPEAKER_03 31:48

So let me yeah, but let's so let me let me say this then. If if Hearts get at least four points out of their first two games in the post split, do they win the league?

SPEAKER_01 32:01

Well well, no, because Celtic and well Celtic Rangers do also both get four points in the first two games. Um I just uh I it's just impossible to call it right now because it's so tight. I I hearts do have to go to Far Park. Typically, hearts struggle at Far Park far, far more than they do when they play Mother Bowl at home. So that's another difficult one. We they go they they host Falkirk. We just we've just seen this weekend how Falkirk are gonna have a say in it somewhere. They're not gonna just let that sit back and watch someone else win the title. They're gonna they're gonna want to have to play their part in this as well. Um, but yet it's the fact that they all play each other, you just you cannot call this right now.

SPEAKER_03 32:44

But but three away games instead of three home games, that's what that's why people think Celtic have some sort of favour from the SFA, for instance.

SPEAKER_01 32:56

Well, yeah, but do you really buy into this for like making it easier for them or harder?

SPEAKER_03 33:01

Like considering they're playing utter garbage, it doesn't matter.

SPEAKER_01 33:05

I would if they were maybe playing like on a plastic pitch or something. If they if one of them were playing Levy, for example, um, I could maybe see the argument of saying like that's a more difficult tie that they've got, but it's because it's so even across the board right now, that's why I don't think anyone's got an advantage or disadvantage.

SPEAKER_02 33:22

I I I agree with Laura, I don't think there's an enormous advantage in it. Also, it's not like you always get this every season about the conspiracy film, oh, they've played them three times away and they've not done like you you still need to play the games. I I'm personally, I'm just like you still need to go to these games, these grounds anyway, and and play these games, just get on with it and and see where you are. The thing is, that and the gauntlet that's been thrown down for all three of these teams is basically if you win your last five games of the season, you'll win the title. That that's basically what's dangling front of these teams right now. And the amazing thing is I don't see any of the three of these teams, and Form would suggest that none of the three of these teams will win all five games, because I think the longest winning run of any team in the league this season, I think it's capped at five games. So even that in and of itself, and then there's that crazy stat that we mentioned earlier on in the show that this weekend is only the second time all season that all three of the title chasing teams have all won in one weekend. So there'll be twists and turns yet to come, and it's it's kind of who's got the stomach for it. My my opinion hasn't really changed from round about January. I think between our uh we were all chatting in in some of our friendship groups as well, Laura. We were all saying how important the January transfer window was, and certainly on paper at the moment, it looks like Rangers had the better one with with the players that have come in. I don't think the Celtic players have have uh affected their their their matches too much. You've had Oxley Chamberlain who's got a couple of winning goals, but um and and and the heart's reinforcements have uh have been good, like fine, but is it's kind of just going to be who's the least shit, like who crawls over the line in the end, and there's twists and turns still to come. And I don't know if everybody's got the stomach for it. Like I was messaging my friends obviously during the the the Falkirk Rangers game yesterday, and I'm like, I don't I don't think I've got the stuff my nerves can't handle another five match days if they're all going to be like that, like total chaos ball. But um, going back to the point that I was starting to make, my money would still be on Celtic at this point, which I know seems silly but at the moment because they've not been on form, they are having a poor season, it's not a great squad, they've had huge issues obviously going on off the pitch as well. But to me, they're still the team that have been there and done this of those three teams. This is uncharted territory for Hartz, it's uncharted uncharted territory for most of their supporters as well, because it's what 88 was the last time they were anywhere near the sniff of of winning a title. Rangers, we obviously know the kind of like the mentality issues that they potentially have, and that they they're just you don't know, they're so Jekyll and Hyde. Hearts' form has been faltering uh but not enough for them to have fallen away from the race. So it's kind of just who will collapse over the line first. And to to me, my I until I'm proven otherwise, I still think it's Celtic because I still think they've got that muscle memory, the experience, the they've certainly in terms of the scheduling, trying to stay away from the conspiracy theories, but they certainly have one of the more favourable, they've probably got the favourable run-in of the three title chasing teams, and that they've got one more home game that I think they also they always play first, or certainly at the same time as like Range Rangers, I think in their fixtures are always playing at the same time or after Celtic and and Hearts, I think, quite a f quite a lot of the time too. So but these these are the five margins that might might make an impact, but given how crazy the rest of the season's gone and the kind of up and down nature of all three of those teams, I I couldn't really call it if you push me, I'd say it's Celtic, but it's still wide open. It's it's going to be absolutely box office.

SPEAKER_03 37:15

I think Rangers will win it. And I think Celtic will finish them.

SPEAKER_01 37:19

I I am actually more siding with Finn. I think that that's typically we see Celtic consistently grinding out results and scoring these stoppage time winners when they have to, when the heat is on. Um, I think they've got the mentality for it that it's been hammered into them so much that they they play until they score. And I just see that happening far more lightly than Hearts, for example, when backs are against the wall and they have to get a winner. I just can't see that happening. Maybe it's just because I've literally seen Celtics do it so often that it just feels so natural to see that. Um, I I think I really don't want it to happen. I don't want Hearts to lose their bottle here, but I think it'll be Celtic Rangers Hearts.

SPEAKER_03 38:05

Celtic Rangers Hearts. So for Hearts fans here, if you if you were to finish third after everything that you've been through, how difficult do you think that would be as a pill to swallow if you finished third after all of this? Is that a kick in the balls, the face, the gooch, and the face of the biggest?

SPEAKER_01 38:26

All of it combined. All of it.

SPEAKER_03 38:28

Oh man.

SPEAKER_02 38:28

Yeah, second and it is it is all of that. Like, there's there's no way of dressing up having led the race for so long and not crossing the the finish line first as anything other than devastating. And I I I think if you're a Hearts fan, that it would be, and and the next couple of weeks are going to be absolutely nerve-shredding if you're a Hearts fan, because like I said, this is uncharted territory. I think the the one positive for me, if Hearts don't end up winning it, that is a positive that can be taken into future seasons, is that with and it's not purely Tony Bloom, and I think that's one of the things that's annoyed me about the English press. It's not just Tony Bloom coming in and changing this around. It certainly had a huge impact in the Jamestown analytics and all the rest of it. But um the they are it looks to me like they are actually building something sustainable that they can potentially be. This isn't a one-season flash in the pan. This isn't just a good squad that is going to get ripped apart in the summer and they're all going to leave, potentially, like a team like Motherwell might do. I think Harts are in this for the longer haul, and if they don't win it this season, they will certainly be challenging over the coming seasons.

SPEAKER_03 39:44

Yeah, I hope so, because there are mainstays in that Hearts team that have been there for years. Shanklin Beningamy has been uh a stalwart this season for Hartz and the first time. Devlin, Halkitt at the back as well. Yeah. Um so yeah, it's it's it's it's just one of those things where when even when Derek McInnes was in charge of Aberdeen, it was it was never that they could be consistent enough to challenge for the title when Rangers went in the top flight. But I'm gonna say this as well. I think this puts Derek McInnes top of the list to be the next Scotland manager. Disagree?

SPEAKER_01 40:20

I don't think anyone can argue with that.

SPEAKER_03 40:22

Unless he gets a job offer down south.

SPEAKER_01 40:24

I don't want Clark to go, I want him to win the World Cup and I want him to stay and get his stature outside Hamden, but I realistically cannot see any argument against it. I feel like it's very realistic that that is it's the same thing that like Clark did this with Kelly and took them to so much success to Europe and made his name there, and everyone went, Well, he's obviously going to get the something job. It just feels like the same scenario we're seeing played out again here.

SPEAKER_03 40:48

If Steve Clark wins the World Cup, like you quit. You quit, you've won. I remember I played in a living aside game, and um what was his name? The the French defender Lebouff, who played for Chelsea was my manager, and like we were laughing and joking, and someone someone slagged him off, and he was just like, Fuck you, I won the World Cup. It was just like the best comeback ever. It's like oh you can't come back to being the so yeah. If Steve Clapp wins the World Cup, he can literally do anything he wants.

SPEAKER_01 41:24

Yeah, fair.

SPEAKER_02 41:25

I think if he gets out the group stage, he's getting a gold statue outside Hamden anyway.

SPEAKER_03 41:29

But Nina CFA can afford that, mate. Maybe gold plated. Gold plated and do that. Just hopefully don't get the guy that did the Cristiano Ronaldo bust. Remember that? That was a horror show. Anyway, on the bombshell, should we end the podcast here? We hope you've enjoyed our comeback. We'll see you next week. We're coming back. We're back. It's good. Hopefully the the production standards have gone downhill wee bit. I've joined Finn in the in the car.

SPEAKER_01 42:06

What is this? We're all married now, and I'm the only one that's in the house. What's gonna happen?

SPEAKER_03 42:11

I'm just gonna let all the guys just they'll look they know. They know Where is your husband, Lord? Where is your husband? Listen, listen, everybody.